Before reading about my morning ... know there is a happy ending. Thank you, Mechelle. I am so glad you were here today.

There's a song from the musical, The Producers, that goes something like this: "Unhaaappy, unhaaappy, veeeeeery unhaaappy. Unhaaappy, unhaaappy, very very very very very very very unhaaappy." That described me this morning. I went to the store to get an anniversary card for Chuck's parents. I just started crying ... and couldn't stop. I cried as I picked out the card, I cried on the way to the checkout line, I cried as I picked out a delicious bottle of Diet Dr. Pepper, I cried while standing behind people in the checkout line. I stopped crying long enough to answer the cashier's question, "Oh, I'm fine, thanks." I cried my way out to the car. I put my head down on the steering wheel and cried a little more. Sometimes you just have to cry ... well maybe not you, but apparently I do.

Blessedly, the day picked up from there. Obviously I was unhaaappy and I let God know about it. I had a few choice remarks about how He has been handling things. Undeservedly, He sent an angel in response ... Mechelle ... friend for 35 years. I was too tired, too weak, too discouraged to pray. I could not ask God to heal Chuck, not again, not one more time ... no way ... no. Sometimes you just need someone to pray for you ... to put their hands on you and say the words that you cannot. Mechelle came up to the hospital and prayed her heart out. She prayed absolutely everything that was on my heart ... without any input from me. How ... how did she know? The Holy Spirit, of course ... the one connection all believers share ... the one voice that speaks to us all ... that can tell us exactly how to minister to someone else's broken heart. Thank you God! Thank you God for Mechelle ... thank you for letting me be ANGRY with you ... thank you for the Holy Spirit, and for answering my anger with a gentle, loving response. Yes, yes, you were right God ... you know what you're doing.

I hope you can laugh upon reading this ... can laugh at how quickly I can go from the depths of despair to utter peace. (Janet ... I know you're laughing at this). I just wanted to share how thankful I am that God knows me ... the real me ... that He knows my heart and patiently endures my tantrums ... that He cries when my heart breaks ... that He lovingly goes before me, making sure the path is safe ... and patiently waits for my heart to submit. Once my heart goes ... the peace floods me ... the peace that passes all my simple, human understanding.

Chuck? He's fine.